What did I say?

"You don't write because you want to say something, you write because you've got something to say." - F. Scott Fitzgerald, author of The Great Gatsby

Can I even call this writing? I guess I can. I'd like to think that's what I am deep down, a writer. Sure, I've published a couple of devotionals, but that isn't making me a Barnes & Noble favorite author. So when I do write, this blog for example, what it is that I have to say? There is another quotation that I like about what someone writes being a riddle for readers to decipher what is being said between the lines. What is written between my lines? Especially over the last couple of days?

After a long talk with the Husband today, I have been turning the wheels inside my head at such an RPM it is nauseating. I've got to quit reacting to things the way I do. It just isn't healthy. I need to do some self-talk when I feel myself getting overwhelmed, angry, anxious. I would like to take up Yoga or something. Perhaps that might help. But when will I have the time and money?

I've got to do something. I think I need direction right now. Jobs aren't working out, the kids act like they hate me, I am being mean to everyone, I lack motivation for the small stuff like doing the dishes, and I need to get rid of this knot in my stomach. So, it is up to me. Maybe my "self" will be able to read what is written here at some point later and read between the lines - get the big picture. Writers often have clarity when they approach what they have already written at some later date. I hope that happens for me.