Friday, July 19, 2013


I leave for Chicago tomorrow morning. This is the first time I have traveled without my children in about six years. I have been to Myrtle Beach with them and my parents the past several summers, but I've not really done any other traveling. And, for the record, I miss it terribly! I am the kind of person that wants to go and do things. I want to be spontaneous and pack a bag in ten minutes then take off to a destination. I want to plan an all-inclusive trip out of the country. I want to see shows, eat at nice restaurants and meet new people.   But I'm afraid that just isn't going to happen.
I'm very afraid of that.
And it weighs on my mind constantly.
What if I die tomorrow?
What if I don't live while I'm alive?
Then what?

Sunday, July 14, 2013


It has been a very long time since I have had a migraine like the one I had Friday night through Saturday morning. I had to be taken to the hospital and given two rounds of medication. I was dry heaving, dehydrated, and very sick. I don't wish that kind of pain on my worst enemy. If you are a migraine sufferer, you will know what I am saying. If you aren't, just imagine someone having your skull in a vice, squeezing until you think it could squeeze no more before your skull cracks wide open. Then compound that with intense throwing up. Not a good combo! Thank God for doctors and drugs.

Tuesday, July 09, 2013

Minute by Minute

Sometimes things just throw you for a loop. It can be a tragedy, or it can even be a nice gesture. In the past few days, I've had both. Examining myself, I find that my mind naturally focuses on the negative things that surround me. Call me a Debbie Downer. Judge me. Make assumptions. I don't mind. At least I'm big enough to admit my faults. 
So, today, I find myself in a constant state of tears. I simply can't help it. Just when I think I may be okay, I shed a tear. Instead of taking things one DAY at a time, I am going to have to take things minute by minute. 

Monday, July 01, 2013


I love a good 1am IHOP run. I do. But, tonight the friends and I decided that we would just do our own IHOP version at home. So, I volunteered to cook an IHOP breakfast at the friends' house. We decided on a menu of s'mores French toast and over - easy eggs. It was a hit. I didn't eat the items on the menu... I'm not a breakfast person, per say.  Had a beverage of choice instead.  Everyone who tried the French toast, though, loved it. It was a fun time had by all.  I may not be able to wake up very early tomorrow, but it is well worth it.  I love cooking for other people when they greatly appreciate it. It makes me feel like Bobby Flay or something.