Running

Today I ran my two miles. This thing called running is so inconsistent for me. Some days I can run two miles; some days I can't. Today was a good day and I ran the entire two miles.
One reason I simply can't run the distances I want to is because I have exercise-induced asthma. I've had it since elementary school. When I first began playing organized, school basketball I began wheezing whenever I'd run up and down the court. My dad used to say, "Oh, you're just not in shape!" No, it was more than that. You see, this wheezing and tightness of the throat and chest continued on and on through the seasons, through the years. When I was in high school and had to "run" the mile for P.E., I could not do it. I'd walk most of the time and then collapse at the end with my face beet red, eyes bulging, and heaving to breath. I was put on medication in sixth grade, I believe, and it helped minimally. I continued to play sports and cheer up through my eleventh grade year of school. Now, as an adult, I have only been truly exercising on a regular basis for a year. I have increased from walking one mile to running two. I, personally, don't feel that is the progress I should have at this point. But, I'm going with it the best I can. I get very frustrated, often cry toward the end of my running, and get upset with my lack of ability and/or progress. But, I am sticking with it. I run three times a week. Like I said, some days are fine, but others are a very difficult struggle reducing me to walking and running in intervals. What I want to be able to do is run (not walk any) a 5k. Wow, some of you say. Wow, how minute is that! For this asthmatic, I see it as an accomplishable goal. Sure, I'd love to "go big" and run a half-marathon. If only! But I will try to take baby steps and go for the 5k. I just wish I'd make faster progress than what I am. I guess I have to listen to my body first and foremost. Remember, at one point in my life (and when I was much younger, nonetheless)I could only walk a mile. Now I can run two. Slow progress, but it's progress, I guess.

Side note: proud of my ex mother-in-law for taking the first step! It's no small feat!

Sometimes people disappoint me.

Longest Day of the Year

Today is the longest day of the year. No, I don't mean there are more than twenty-four hours in this particular day, I just mean that there is the most amount of sunlight in the day on June 21. Today, fifteen years ago, I gave birth to a baby girl. She was my second daughter, born when my first daughter was only eighteen months old. I can remember my oldest daughter coming in and leaning over my hospital bed anxiously awaiting the arrival of her sibling. She was excited, but didn't understand why her momma had to be in that hospital, not at home with her. It's funny how at the time, the pain can be excruciating, but soon after all those pains are forgotten when you can hold your sweet newborn baby in your arms. It is as though time stand still if only for a moment. Now, that black, curly-haired baby is growing up, only a few years away from being an adult. I can only hope I'm raising her right, teaching her things that I'm supposed to, guiding her in the right directions. I wish my laid-back, caring, honest, compassionate Cammi a happy fifteenth birthday today. May the years ahead of her treat her well.

A Father

There are certain biological functions that can make a person a father. That is true. But what makes a true father is something more complicated. A father is one who nurtures, one who molds and shapes, one who is there along the way of tough life issues for a person. That, and so much more, is what makes a father a true father. To fathers all around the world today, Happy Father's Day. Pat yourselves on the back for a job well done.

Catching up

The past couple of weeks have been a whirlwind of activity. I cleaned out our closet (one of them); that was an experience. I had three forty gallon trashbags full of clothes that I donated to people. Thank goodness, those people could wear them ALL! They were grateful, too, which was nice.
Every Monday I have been running Cam to her basketball games in the Southport and Indy area. She plays two games per night, usually back to back. Two out of the three times we've gone, we didn't get home until almost midnight! Then, the next morning, she and I have to get up to get her to an 8am practice. Wow! Yes, no wonder I slept most of the day yesterday. I was playing catch up on my sleep. You see, her basketball practices are every Tues, Wed, Thurs, from 8-10am. EVERY WEEK! Then, on top of that, Sydney has dance practice two times a week for three or four hours at a time. My schedule is full.
I still have to clean out my scrapbooking closet (that'll be boatloads of fun). It will be a day-long project. I'm sure, though, I'll find things I didn't even remember having. Maybe it'll be like Christmas all over again. Maybe.
There is much more on the agenda for the summer. It is already going by so fast. I'm almost in mourning that it is slipping away from me.
Makes me think of my neighbor's mom telling me at my book study at church Monday morning about her small home for sale in Florida. She wanted to know if I was interested. Interested?! Me?! Of course I'm "interested". But one would have to have money to purchase that home, wouldn't he? That sort of takes me out of the running, now doesn't it? Man. Do you know how tempting just the words are "Florida home for sale"? It is 8min. from one beach and 13 from another. It is also only an hour away from the gorgeous waters of Clearwater Beach. Been there. Like it. Want to be near it. Alas, it won't happen. Nice to dream about, though. And yes, I do dream about being in a warm climate with sand and surf. Often.

They are growing up so fast!
These photos were taken on Memorial Day a couple of weeks ago. I just love them!

Please Pray

My good friend Hope's son, Ethan, was taken to Riley Intensive Care Unit yesterday with his sugar in the 500's. He is struggling, according to her, and will have a lifelong battle ahead of him. Please pray for him and his family. He's one sick boy! Diabetes is a scary thing for an adult, not to mention a kid. Love you, Hope and Ethan!

Quite painless

Going "shopping" and trying items of clothing on is quite painless in comparison to how it used to be. Used to, I'd cry like a baby by the time I had gone in and out of the dressing room a couple of times with nothing fitting like it should. Now, things fit and it is a game to see how low the size can be to please me. Sure, there is sooo much more room for improvement, but I've come a long way to be the weight I am today. It hasn't been easy. In fact, just Saturday I was whining and complaining to one of my close friends that I get to the point of exhaustion over the whole watching what I eat, exercising bit. It is just as tough mentally as it is physically. The mind is a tricky thing. So, over the holiday weekend, I was not on track. I had an asthma attack while running on Saturday, to which I responded with being angry and crying over. I ate horrible foods and consumed some beverages, which I had not done in quite some time. Then, the moment I let my mind wrap around what I had done, I felt insanely guilty. Horrible that I allowed myself three days of nonstop nasty eating. Why would I have wanted to do that to myself when I had just triumphed over the weight thing in getting a swimsuit that fit, in a nice size, not jumbo??? Why??? So today I must get back up on the eating wagon. I must get back on track. I don't want to blow this deal, you know? Oh, and we're having a pitch in at lunch at school. What'll I do there? Hopefully they'll have some veggies or something. Lord knows I can't even eat the dessert I'm taking. UGH! See what I mean? It's a vicious cycle of wanting, but can't have it. Not fun. But it beats the alternative of being fat. I have to keep telling myself that.