Saturday, November 28, 2009

Wonder When?

I wonder when it all becomes "me, me, me" for ME? To others' advantage, though, I don't make it all about ME. Given that, others get to walk all over me. I'm quite tired of it, frankly.
Perhaps I will start being a shitty mother. Will that get me some help? Will that make others WANT to help me? Seems as though if you are a deadbeat dad or mom, someone with some sense steps in and makes the grand effort that gets your kids out of the slums. Perhaps that is what I need to strive for?
I'm praying, Lord, I'm praying. But the thoughts still invade my head. I can't get past it. Trying, but can't. I need help. I don't want to be like some other moms and dads and just let my kids be another statistic. But, that's the hard way, isn't it? The easy way is to just sit back and let someone else take over.

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